CONVERSATION with a hairdresser

Her: Hello, would you like some tea?
Me: No thanks, I'm ok
Her: Please come this way to have your hair washed
Me: Ok sure.
Her: Is the temperature ok?
Me: Yes, thankyou
Her: Would you like conditioner in your hair?
Me: Yes, thankyou.
some time goes by
Her: Please sit up so that I can dry your hair
Me: sit up so that she can dry hair
Her: Please come over here and have a seat
Me: go over there and have a seat with lots of big layers of plastic all over me 'Thankyou'
Her: Soooo, what can we do with your hair today?
Me: Well, can you please cut it so that it is short on the one side and long on the other. (show picture from magazine)
Her: Glances furtively at picture and moves hair around in different directions and says ' When last did you get your hair cut?'
Me: About 6 months ago.
Her: Have you been here before?
Me: No, I havent, actually.
Her: Which way does your parting usually go?
Me: This way (point)
Her: Your hair is very dry, should we take half an inch off?
Me: Well, please can you take about an inch off on the one sid. As its so dry, and about 5 inches off on the other side, similar to the picture and please can you make sure its quite sort of messy
Her: So you dont want it to be too styalised?
Me: No, not really, thanks.
Her: ok, are you sure you wouldnt like some tea?
Me: no, I'm ok thanks
Her: would you like a magazine to read?
Me: no, thanks.
Her: gets scissors and cuts hair for about 10 minutes and says ' where are you from?'
Me: I'm from South Africa, where are you from?
Her: I'm from England.
Me: Where in Englad are you from originally?
Her: well, I'm from Coventry in the midlands
Me: Coventry is a beautiful town, do you go home much?
Her: Sometimes. I'm going home for christmas. How long have you been here?
Me: about 7 years
Her: Will you go back one day?
Me: no, I love England
Her: Yes, there are a lot of South Africans here. I worked with a South African in my last job.
Hair dresser picks up mirror and shows hair at the back and says: 'have you thought of getting highlights?'
Me: yes I did once, but my hair is going grey so i dye my hair.
Her: oh yes, I can see you do it yourself
Me: Ja, I do
Her: There we goooowww, how does that look?
Me: that's nice, thankyou.
Her: ruffles hair and says: ' all you need to do is put some gel in your hair in the morning'
(puts a handfull of green stuff into my hair, and my head feels instantly a lot heavier and strangely detached)
Me: yes, thanks.
Her: takes off all layers of plastic stuff from shoulders and lets hair sprinkle onto the floor.
Walks to till.
Me: give plastic card to hair dresser
Her: rings uknown amount into the till and gives paper to sign
Me: sign and add tip and say 'thankyou'
Her: Bye then, have a lovely day.
Me: thanks, you too. bye.